The chairman overseeing the rescue of damsels in distress. Yup, that’s me!
Awkward job, you might say but that is exactly what I do, what I live on and what I survive with.
I don’t get paid with money though, the happiness of my clients brings me fulfillment and guess what I save them from?
Loneliness, Trauma,abusive relationships, backstabbing friends and a whole lot of other evil things. In other words, you can say I put them back on track in love.
How I discovered this job, I dunno. When it started, I have no idea, but I’ve been doing it for as long as I can remember.
(Now for the good part) How many damsels I’ve saved; 679, how many I’ve lost; Nil. Call it boasting, I really don’t care but am just too good at what I do.
So, here I am this fine monday morning in my office. Its pitch black as usual with the only source of light being the windows.
My phone rings… “At last!”
“You have an appointment, Sir” my receptionist says over the intercom, “Send her in”
There is a knock on my door and in comes a teenage lady, her face looking like she could burst into tears at any moment. Immediately, my office shines a deep red color. I’ll tell you the significance of that later.
As my job proffers, I calm her down.
We exchange pleasantries and I get straight to the point. (This part of my job is boring, so I’ll just skip it).
From all she said, amidst her crying, I could pick out that “she has a boyfriend but her heart lies with another man. One who’s heart lies with another lady, and the lady’s heart too…… You get the drift sha. Its quite complex, even for me.
After this ordeal, I smile in my seat and as cocky as I can get say “You’ve come to the right place, miss”. We continue discussing for a while and the solution finally hits me, but I keep it to myself. You see, one thing I’ve learnt in my vast years of experience is that you do not jump to conclusions no matter how much you think you’ve got it.
Soon, the day grows older and I set another appointment with her and bid her good night. The room is a light shade of green at the moment.
The next day comes quickly and I notice the color of the room “Apparently, we still have a long way to go”.
At a little over noon, she arrives; this time with a smile. My office becomes a deep shade of yellow. “Now, we’re making progress”.
So, we continue our discussion. Along the line, I know she has got just two options. She either leaves her current boy friend and chase after the love of her life or she sticks to being sorry for herself and stick to her boyfriend.
I tell her both options and she makes the right choice. (They don’t make wrong choices; not with me in charge). My office is now a lighter shade of yellow. “Almost there”
In my presence, she calls him and tells him what she has had in mind all this while and waits for his response. He hangs up and I see fear and rejection written all over her face. My office, by the way is back to the light shade of green. “This aint looking good”.
The phone finally rings after what seemed like eternity and I watch as she picks up the receiver. My stance a perfect facade of calm, while inwardly battling with anxiety raging. “Maybe, I am about to record my first failure…. Something, my mind isn’t ready for…”
Finally, I see it. The office lits up a bright immaculate white light amidst a white smile on her face. “Mission Accomplished!”
I listen to her set up a date with him while I try to suppress my smile . Her face screams happiness and gratitude while she’s takes her leave. She says thank you and shuts the door; immediately, my office turns a gloomy shade of black, (if there is anything like that). This is the bad side of the job.
#Sigh, “can’t wait for client 681!” 😦
Thanks for reading.
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