A billion scenarios and I have been tempted to take a leap off a skyscraper or cut myself so I can bleed to death. Life is very cruel as we all know but then it also has silver linings; lots and lots of them. My silver linings have been the people around me, actually their actions towards me, voluntary and involuntary, planned and unplanned, good or evil. Be it a gesture, an advice, an insult, a smile, a lie or a kiss, something has always kept me going, kept the fire that burns in me today still alive and I owe it to all of these people, in other words, everybody.
I dart back to the winter of 2007 and my mind can still paint that picture that was created in my head that morning and I would love to paint it in your minds now.
SS 1 and I had fared badly in my tests again, everybody was worried, everybody except me. I had given up on life, gotten so visionless and settled with the mindset that I was never gonna be successful. Maybe live an average life but definitely not efficacious, maybe just end up like my neighbors who had been living in the same two bedroom apartment for decades.
I was a great dreamer though, my brain could create pictures of a successful person; they were never just of me and so I delved further into the abyss of depression.
The day a thief is going to get caught by the owner, no matter how much he plans and avoids the traps that have been set for him, he would still get caught.
That’s a quote used frequently by one of my colleagues, and I concur with him. You can’t stop destiny no matter how much you try and that’s exactly what happened that fateful morning.
My mum drove me to school as usual, and it seemed like the day was going to turn out like every other day but I was wrong. Instead of turning back when I alighted from her car, my mum parked the car, got down and walked into the school dragging me along. It wasn’t the first time that was happening so I wasn’t bothered.
She met my teachers and they exchanged pleasantries before they started their conversation. I was less interested in it so I diverted my attention to my classroom where my classmates were staring out of the window at us with looks of bewilderment.
I had not been gone long and I switched my attention back to my mother and the teachers just in time to hear her say this;
“Dami is not a dullard. I’m very sure of that.
To my understanding, when his brother reads, he assimilates about 50% of what he has read, whereas Dami can go as far as 80% or more. His current grades are definitely below his ability, he is much better than this.”
It’s been five and a half years now, but I still hear that statement like it was yesterday. So throughout that day in school, the words of my mom kept playing in my head. Part of me was happy for her faith in me, the rest was angry at myself; for letting everybody and my mother down, especially myself.
Maybe she lied then, that didn’t matter. What really mattered was that my mom, my silver lining, believed in me. Her statement turned my life around, it made me discover who I truly am.
Today I’m a student of architecture in the best university in the world, an 87% grade point average, a writer, a speaker and most especially a grateful son. And she made it happen.
So are you at a crossroad? Are you lost in a world of rejection and hatred or have you given up on yourself. Do yourself a favor; get a sheet of paper and write a list of the people who you think believe in you; your parents, a bro or sis, family, a girlfriend or loved ones. If your sheet of paper is still empty, write God.
When you’re done with your list, make a resolution to prove that person or people right and stick to making sure you fulfill that resolution. You are here for a reason.
Some people make the world special just by being in it. I want to be one of such people, I hope you do too.