Memoirs of God by MAE

Hello there!

Mike Dammy here :D… But keep calm, do not get your hopes too high, I aint writing this one though… Sad shey.. I know…

Anyway, We on here are introducing a new creative/Inspirational Writer. She would be on here on Sundays and Tuesdays. I would have like to continue my intro but i’ll leave her to do the rest.

So, meet MAE in “Memoirs of God”

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Memoirs of God by Mae

Ever felt like you’re alone in your own world. Ever felt like no one would understand no matter how much they tried. Ever felt like something is wrong. Ever felt you haven’t done enough. Ever felt like giving up cause u think you can’t do it, you have given your best already. Ever get this empty feeling like you don’t matter. Ever felt like no matter how much you try it doesn’t get better. Ever felt like losing hope because no matter which way you go it’s not working. Ever felt like you’re not living you just exist. Ever felt like your dreams are more than you. Ever felt like time is running out and nothing is happening. Ever felt like you’re only talking it and never living it.

Well i felt all of these and much more. I felt i didn’t know which way to go cause no matter which way i went i just got stuck. I try my hands on so many things yet none gave me joy. I was confused cause my life no longer made sense to me. It felt like I was losing it and there was no one to turn to. It felt like there was absolutely no one to share this with. It felt like my troubles were eating me up. It felt like i had so many people around yet no one. It felt like everyone was running and I was standing wondering which way to go. It felt like this and it felt like that. I couldn’t even find the words to describe those feelings. They just came and when they did i just felt numb. I felt empty. I felt down. I felt indifferent. I felt lifeless.

All of those emotions and more were things I felt at a stage in my life that I couldn’t explain. I am sure you might be wondering why all of these emotions for a young girl like me.

But then something changed. I no longer feel all of those things. I am now a hundred percent sure that someone cares. Someone greater than my imaginations. Someone my mind cant understand or comprehend. Someone my mind drifts to when i feel all of this. He said to me i will stand by you when no onez there. I will love you till the end of time. It might not seem like it but i am working out something great in you and through you. You are perfect he says. You are the most precious amongst my treasures. The very hairs on your head i know. You are engraved on my palm. I know your very make up. Those days when am down, i lay on my bed cover myself up and have a good cry but at the end i smile cause i know this person cares. I smile knowing there is hope. I smile knowing i have a friend who is greater than even a brother. I smile knowing am not alone.

He didn’t promise that i won’t fall but he said he will be there to catch me when i fall. He dint promise that it will be easy but he said he will be by my side through the tough times. He dint promise me a smooth road but he said he ll carry me through the rough ones. He din’t promise me the whole world but he gave me him, who owns the whole world.

Sometimes i cry at the thought of the love he has for me because i don’t understand it. Sometimes am afraid i can never love him like he loves me. Sometimes am afraid i will always let him down. Sometimes am afraid am not up to the standard.

But at the end i remember, he is not looking for a perfect person, he is not looking for the person who has no wrong, he is not looking for the person who has a hold of everything. All he asks is for a heart to believe him and then trust him. A heart to love him not by itself but by his own love. That’s all he asks.

That He, is God(father, son and spirit) and he is the smile beneath my smile.

My name is Ajayi Mojisola Elizabeth but on here I will go by the name Mae……don’t bother about how I came about the name. It has romance attached to it tho. I will be a regular on here sharing with you my daily experiences with God (the Holy Spirit). I hope an insight into my life will give someone hope to hang on. Remain blessed………xx

MAE

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