Insights

I noticed it the first time but I wasn’t sure. So I chilled. The instrumentals kept creeping into my ears like beautiful incense and I wondered If most of our local artistes were immune to calm, insightful instrumentals.

The umpteenth time it played, I had confirmed my fears. This was my sub. Omari was subbing me but then I remembered I barely knew him or him me. Said a couple of HI(s) around school but that was about any contact we ever had. He wasn’t subbing me in particular. He was subbing myself myself and a billion other guys out there.

Guys prone to thinking they don’t become Exes. That no matter what, we can’t become leftovers. No, that’s a problem for through ladies. We leave rejuvenated like phoenixes reborn out of our ashes. The ladies could be the ashes for all we know but we don’t care. We just fly off to our next intending target, set the P, send the DMs and start the process all over again. Many walk around with this mentality and I daresay that’s a whole lot of bullshit.

It’s fair to say we are but visitors in this world and one day our souls would jet off to God knows where. So why delay or dilly dally? Since you only live once, live it large. Wreck hearts and leave self esteems destroyed in your paths.

We won’t be the first.
Our forefathers did exactly this.
They relegated their women to the background. Rendered them worthless. Barely worth a half-man. Inconceivable of anything great except It’s a delicious steamy pot of soup. They cast veils upon their faces like they didn’t subscribe for the same life package we had. Or they didn’t all suck identical mammary glands.

True, that situation was appalling.
Today, It’s worse. Balance has shifted slightly. Now we have two general classes of women; the good and the bad. And the bad are triumphing well. Or so they think. If only they understood that this same men would flutter to the sides of the good ones when marriage or anything serious beckons. They’ve failed to see beyond the one night stands and club orgies and rendezvous.

It’s sad to see that morals are considered with a pinch of salt. The crave (and craze) to enjoy life has clouded decent judgements.
Who’s to blame foe this?

I say everybody.

But permit me to remove the log in my eyes before I leave you to yours. I have lost one too many good girls in my short life in my quest to enjoy life just more. I aim high or so I think.  Video vixens, Club trouts and half naked ladies must be exploited and fast.
The struggle is real.
And If you can’t get any of them, you grab the nearest good girl and convert her. Immediately you’re done, you scamper off to your next prey… Promising heaven and earth and love that doesn’t exist. Consequentially, that “good-turned-bad” girl you left joins the lot and goes on rampage herself. Now she understands the concept of YOLO. Sad I tell you.

In conclusion, someone tweeted this this morning;

That She’s a good girl does not mean She’s the right one

True. Very true. Every good girl out there won’t fit in with your temperament. Do yourself and the world world a favour then and leave her to herself and let the right one find her. Don’t further invest in the bad girl’s ever growing reservoir.

“Falling in love is easy, Staying in love is the hard part.”
If you’re not ready, stay away from it.

I could have sugarcoated this but I’m done doing that anymore.

* * *

This post was inspired by a single from revolutionary rapper and poet; Omari ( @AybeeOmari):
Bloom Baby Bloom

You should listen to it. It’s awesome and insightful. Just click the song title above to download it.

Have a wonderful day.

Mike Dammy

Scrap Common Sense!

Who says you have to follow the rules?_ Sourced from Googlr

Who says you have the rules?_ Sourced from Googlr

Let me start with saying that the concept behind Common sense is a whole fusion of nonsense!

Am I pissed? Hell Yea!

• • •

That said, now am gonna try and make this as practical as possible so I don’t get targeted or accused of blasphemy or some sort of desecration. By the way, I don’t mean “Common Sense as a general perception of something” but “Common Sense as a general acceptance of situations or ill luck”

Majority of folks live with the mind set that some rules in life are impossible to overturn or some situations are as permanent as death. In this state, Yorubas are quick to say “A gba fun Olorun”. A sign of resignation, or more exclusively; a lack of hope or faith and then they put it all on God for righteousness sake so at least God won’t say you never told me. Most times, they never expect something good to come out of those situations and their belief always makes sure nothing good happens.
The ability of Lazarus to rise up was not because of his faith in miracles, or that of his sisters or anybody whatsoever, his resurrection was based solely on the faith Jesus had and that belief was strong enough to wake him from four days of slumber in the clutches of death.

Einstein, Newton, Shakespeare are not famous because they stuck to the norms, its cuz they dreamt more and pushed more than a normal human thereby discovering things the lay man would consider out of this world. We owe our comfort today to these people and everybody who cared to have uncommon sense and we also owe them an obligation that we’ll stick to continuing the legacy they left off, unfortunately, this isn’t the case.

Now, this is where I focus on Africa; the continent that has refused to grow. Our beliefs, culture, tradition which in actual sense were meant to ginger development in us have suddenly been considered as stumbling blocks to our progress as a people. Our skill in picking out the worst in any situation is second to none, no wonder we are second to none in developing allergies to innovation. We claim the whites are super smart and God has favored them greatly and all this done to just hide the fact that we are scared of exploring the unknown. If everybody was like us, we’ll still be taking the occasional trek from Ethiopia to Gabon because nobody would have invented cars and the Wright brothers would have died popular bicycle repairers; popular on their street alone! If man was scared, America would still be a fallow unexplored land and Columbus would have died a man who had a phobia for water, Imagine!

What am saying here, is that the world is a large expanse of norms and common sense and majority of its inhabitants are blinded by these and nothing is being done to change this. Instead some parents deceive themselves and send their kids to school, you’ll be a great scientist or physicist they’ll tell him in elementary school. when he is in secondary school, they force him to study science, he goes to the university and studies a professional course, comes out and works everyday of his life trying to make ends meet and finally dies a man whose obituary would claim lived a fruitful life! Garbage! Pure rubbish!

A wise man or woman once said;

    The graveyard is the richest place on earth.

because it contains ideas and potentials that men have let die with them all in the name of playing safe and living a coded life. Back track to bible days, King Solomon wrote in Proverbs 2:6 that “”God is a mine of Common sense”. In other words, just like the purity of fuel becomes better with depth, so does the depth of your common sense increase when you till this mine. some fellows would barely scratch the surface; some like Jesus would as deep as they can get and end up having their name stamped in the sands of time while some fools in the end would not even carry an axe talk less of attempting to explore the mine. that’s why some folks would forever consider a 7 course meal a once in a lifetime luxury and some others take it a brisk breakfast.

It’s high time we Africans wake up to the fact that the norms don’t govern the world anymore; common sense doesn’t make sense anymore. It’s time we learn that what great men would term normal to them is what we might see as the actions of a demigod.

    It’s time to think outside the box.

    It’s time to explore the unknown.

    It’s time to take those “no turning back risks”.

    Push yourself to the limits because in actual sense, there are no limits in life.

God is called the ageless, change less and limitless God and trust me, those names are not some sort of fallacy, they are all perfect descriptions of his person. Therefore, if we can take to him, his qualities would rub off on us. Remember anything started without God is running with a self destruct timer. So if you can think like you would expect him to, take risks that you think Jesus would take, take that gigantic step that you’ve imagined Shakespeare taking and watch your life soar out of obscurity and get stamped in History.

For Your Info
Shakespeare started thinking out of the box at a very tender age. At the time when boys stealing apples from orchards of the well to do was considered the most mischievous thing a child could do, Shakespeare was caught stealing a sheep!
I’m not telling you to go steal but you get my drift, don’t wait till your 40 to explore the unknown, it might just be too late.

I hope you’ve been inspired.

Bless

• • •

Please drop your comments and share the post to your facebook and twitter pages.
Don’t forget to subscribe to the blog to get updates in your email on new episodes and articles, Like our facebook page and follow us on Twitter;

@damstylee, @mystique561, @kolstoppa

Thank you for Reading.


Mike Dammy

The Power of Choice

Today, we welcome another Guest writer, another lady actually. The ladies are impressive nau… No ulterior motives whatsoever from my part.. 😀

If you missed last week’s “Letter to the Holy Spirit” by Miss Moji though, you are a learner. I indulge you to go check it out as it was mind blowing.

You can view it here —>>> https://damstylee.wordpress.com/2013/02/16/letter-to-the-holy-spirit/

Anyway, today’s article was written by Miss Agoyi Kemisola (@Agoyi_kemisola)

Ever wondered if You had a say in anything you’ve ever done, well, this article is for you. I also consider the post somewhat controversial but then, Its my opinion. *lips sealed*

Enjoy and be Inspired!

• • •

Its your Choice _ Sourced from Google

Its your Choice _ Sourced from Google

The greatest power given to every man on earth is the power of choice.
You can choose to live or choose to die.
You can choose to be for God or choose to be for the world.
You can choose to be on top of the world, you can as well choose to be below it.
You can choose to standout among your peers, you can also choose to blend in with them or be under them.
You can choose to live your life for others, you can also still choose to live it for yourself.
You can choose to be anything in this world (that is, what the world turns you to be) and you can also choose to be whatever ‘YOU WANT’ to be.
Even though life doesn’t always turn out the way we plan it, but you can still choose to stand-up to whatever life presents to you and choose to make the best of it or allow it make the worst of you.
You can choose to fight it or wallow in its inconvenience.
In all this, ONE thing is peculiar and certain…
And That is, No matter what you do,
No matter what you are,
No matter where you are or how you are,
At any point in time of your life…
…IT WAS YOUR CHOICE!
Because in every situation you find yourself in life, you always have a choice and you choose what you want.
Seriously, there is nothing like ‘I DON’T HAVE A CHOICE’!

So, learn to use THE POWER OF CHOICE well and meaningfully.

You wield it for evil or for good,
You use it wisely or foolishly,
It would always bring its yield fully…
As one of the laws of nature says-
“You will surely reap whatever you sow”,
But also remember…”In multiple folds”

Thanks for reading…
I hope my message was passed across well and fully.

Agoyi Kemisola

(@Agoyi_Kemisola)

• • •

Please drop your comments and share the post to your facebook and twitter pages.
Don’t forget to subscribe to the blog to get updates in your email on new episodes and articles.

Thank you for Reading.

Bless

Questions for the gods

Hey there!

School, laziness, several visits from that lady, all in all, We (Myself in particular) are extremely sorry for not putting up anything of late.

So today, I have decided to write something both fun and inspiring, I’ve titled it “Question for the gods”.

I’ve seen this phrase a couple of times and I bet you have too. Simple logic connotes that it means a question that cannot be answered, at least not anytime soon.
Several of questions have emerged based on this phrase, a few have been valid and well thought of, some others hilarious, and the rest just pure results of advanced exposure to ill-knowledge and heightened stupidity.

No offence there but how is “when will a Nigerian or Yoruba man have sense” logical? Part of it is painment on my part though but it’s still not smart in anywhere to say that, and unless you intended for it to be a joke, something is wrong with you.

When will PHCN generate 24/7 electricity to our homes

As hilarious as this question seems, it is quite true and valid. At least, you must have spent a couple of years at least in Nigeria, or heard of it but none of us never met the “good times” our parents boast of, the times when law and order was uncorrupted, when school was free, and when the roads were paved with gold; ok, that exaggerating a little but you get what my drift. But unless they were lying and are just trying to protect the country’s self-image, something really went wrong and it’s quite unfortunate that nobody has found out why yet. Question for the gods?

Maybe, maybe not. Your willingness to effect a change in this country would determine what option you choose. The man with no eye for hope, no sense of belief and a no go area for courage would answer yes.
The others, most definitely the minority of the population would answer no. some because they believe a change can be effected and a few others because they are indifferent but this side of the congregation looks right or rather, feel right.

Whose side am I on?

The guys that answered no of course! And trust me, it’s not because this side is good. I do hope you are on this side of the fence too.
The world is a haven of opportunities and different questions are embedded in this simple one and it can only truly be answered if we answer our share of the questions that link up to this one.
What’s my share? You might ask.
Remember they say “a tree cannot make a forest”, that also applies here. Stick to your “I don’t care” attitude, worry about your life alone and it would remain a question for the gods.

Can Nigeria be among the world’s leading countries in 2025?

Question for the gods?

That’s your question to answer.

______________________________
Thanks for reading…
Please ponder on the question and do leave a comment. 🙂

Mike Dammy

2025 is a reality.

Whoever said Dark was Black?

I would love to know who the person is, and congratulate him on a statement well said, almost well said.

A not so long span of years of sojourn on this wonderful rock we call earth and I’ve spent them in prevarication, more like a computer program. But who would blame me when my elders have cut out the pathways of my life in which I, as an obedient child have to walk through like a dummy not minding what effects my actions were having.  My predestinated purpose, you could say.

I hail from a land of giants, in a colony of dark people, on an island (or almost an island) of wealth and prosperity called Africa, but its inhabitants are quite not on the same page with their dwelling place. I would term them backwards, most of them. I have been privileged to be different, one of a kind, but sincerely, does it pay to be unique in this situation? Is it profitable to be heading in one direction when almost everybody is going in the opposite direction? Is it?

My abode, the giant of Africa, our great country Nigeria is a land flowing with milk and honey; that’s what our neighbors, the westerners can see though, what I’ve been made to see is a land invaded with thorns and bristles. You wouldn’t blame me for that though, I was just been a typical Nigerian. The question now is who takes the blame?

Do we blame the westerners for degrading and looking down on us or do we blame our mentalities for accepting degradation.  Yeah, they did call us black but what is most important is what do we call ourselves? Who do you call yourself?

A great motivational speaker, Fela Durotoye said in one of his speeches that God said Nigeria was going to be the most desirable place to live in the year 2025, and I have been privileged to meet the young man who would be the country’s head during that period and trust me, Nigeria’s future is very bright. So now, we have a vision, a goal, and an end in mind but no method.

When a man does not have a direction to his goal, every direction is the right direction.

What are you doing to make 2025 a reality? What is your role to play? Do we wait for the westerners to come down and lead us by the hand so we don’t get lost? Or do we grow up and lead ourselves?

Life is short, very short indeed but then it’s just long enough for anybody to make a massive impact. We all have goals and dreams; the question is

“Are you willing to go the extra mile to see your goal achieved?”

We are the future of Nigeria, let’s not forget that. When unity is embedded in a goal, success is almost a surety. So gather up your pens if you’re a writer, your cameras, your hammers, screw drivers, drawing boards, calculators, graph sheets, lab coats, microphones and every other equipment you would need and let’s tune this country to success.

2025 can be a reality only if you believe.

I am a motivational writer and speaker by mandate.

This is my calling.

What’s yours?

 

 

 

Damstylee

Our Silver Linings

A billion scenarios and I have been tempted to take a leap off a skyscraper or cut myself so I can bleed to death. Life is very cruel as we all know but then it also has silver linings; lots and lots of them. My silver linings have been the people around me, actually their actions towards me, voluntary and involuntary, planned and unplanned, good or evil. Be it a gesture, an advice, an insult, a smile, a lie or a kiss, something has always kept me going, kept the fire that burns in me today still alive and I owe it to all of these people, in other words, everybody.

I dart back to the winter of 2007 and my mind can still paint that picture that was created in my head that morning and I would love to paint it in your minds now.

SS 1 and I had fared badly in my tests again, everybody was worried, everybody except me. I had given up on life, gotten so visionless and settled with the mindset that I was never gonna be successful. Maybe live an average life but definitely not efficacious, maybe just end up like my neighbors who had been living in the same two bedroom apartment for decades.

I was a great dreamer though, my brain could create pictures of a successful person; they were never just of me and so I delved further into the abyss of depression.

 The day a thief is going to get caught by the owner, no matter how much he plans and avoids the traps that have been set for him, he would still get caught.

That’s a quote used frequently by one of my colleagues, and I concur with him. You can’t stop destiny no matter how much you try and that’s exactly what happened that fateful morning.

My mum drove me to school as usual, and it seemed like the day was going to turn out like every other day but I was wrong. Instead of turning back when I alighted from her car, my mum parked the car, got down and walked into the school dragging me along. It wasn’t the first time that was happening so I wasn’t bothered.

She met my teachers and they exchanged pleasantries before they started their conversation. I was less interested in it so I diverted my attention to my classroom where my classmates were staring out of the window at us with looks of bewilderment.

I had not been gone long and I switched my attention back to my mother and the teachers just in time to hear her say this;

“Dami is not a dullard. I’m very sure of that.

To my understanding, when his brother reads, he assimilates about 50% of what he has read, whereas Dami can go as far as 80% or more. His current grades are definitely below his ability, he is much better than this.”

It’s been five and a half years now, but I still hear that statement like it was yesterday. So throughout that day in school, the words of my mom kept playing in my head. Part of me was happy for her faith in me, the rest was angry at myself; for letting everybody and my mother down, especially myself.

Maybe she lied then, that didn’t matter. What really mattered was that my mom, my silver lining, believed in me. Her statement turned my life around, it made me discover who I truly am.

Today I’m a student of architecture in the best university in the world, an 87% grade point average, a writer, a speaker and most especially a grateful son. And she made it happen.

So are you at a crossroad? Are you lost in a world of rejection and hatred or have you given up on yourself. Do yourself a favor; get a sheet of paper and write a list of the people who you think believe in you; your parents, a bro or sis, family, a girlfriend or loved ones. If your sheet of paper is still empty, write God.

When you’re done with your list, make a resolution to prove that person or people right and stick to making sure you fulfill that resolution. You are here for a reason.

Some people make the world special just by being in it. I want to be one of such people, I hope you do too.


Damstylee

 

Mama

Hmm… I shrug and draw my coat closer to keep the cold out.

I wonder how long I’ve been kneeling here,

While my ears are still been attended to by the beautiful music from the humming birds.

The aura of sadness and death is still pretty much around,

But it’s pretty much been diluted with calmness and I fell solemnity approaching and fast too.

My gaze switches to the tombstone which I’m facing and my mind unconsciously travels to the past and I go through a series of memories before I finally arrive in the porch of my childhood home.

I’m suddenly oblivious of my Papa’s presence, and I see Gabriel in the distance running towards us from the field.

There is a large grin on his face and I smile mildly now remembering why he had it.

His cow, which was his first, has just conceived her first calf and he had anticipated it all summer.

“It’s a boy.”

Papa looks up from the newspaper his attention was buried in and manages a faint smile.

It’s obvious he’s trying to hide something but I never saw it then.

“I wish i did though.”

Gabriel reaches the porch in no time, takes a while catch his breath and starts explaining the ordeal.

I see myself get excited as much as he is and was just about to run off to the barn when Mama’s voice halted my advance.

“That’s my boy.

I’m proud of you, Gabriel”

Her voice sounded so pale and she looked worse, maybe even more than I remembered.

I wasn’t bothered though, at least then.

My young infant mind was totally excited at the prospect of meeting Eddy.

That’s what Gabriel later named the calf.

Papa stands up and slowly guides her to his chair. I can still see the forced smile on her face,

And her cheek bones were so visible……

#Argh!

There is a moment of silence and i finally break the air.

“Who’s Loo-ke-mah?”

I now see the shock on Papa’s face when I said that.

At first nobody says anything, but Mama finally did;

“Leukemia is a bad man. A very very bad man.

“He is hurting me, but don’t worry, God will deal with him soon.”

“Why can’t Papa kill him with his gun?”

“He can’t. Only God can.”

“Besides, Papa can’t use his gun to kill a human being”

“But he is hurting you!”

“It still doesn’t matter, Mary”

“But he……”

“Don’t disturb your mum. Didn’t you just hear that it’s only God that can kill him? Papa blurts out.

Why must you be so stubborn?”

“I only wanted to……..”

“Go to your room!”

Disappointed and visibly shaken, I walk into the house wondering what exactly i did wrong.

If only I understood.

I feel so insensitive.

Later that night, Papa took Mama to the local clinic nearby but Mama never came back.

Nobody said why but i didn’t care then.

I just acted stupidly like I always did.

A nail biting breeze jerks me back to reality and I’m back in the cemetery.

Kneeling right in front of Mama’s tomb.

“I miss her.

I really miss her.”

It’s been 10 years since Mama died, but it seems just like yesterday that she left.

I won’t forget our last conversation though.

Right before they left for the clinic that night,

I was lying in bed still angry with Papa because of his outburst, when Mama walked in,

“Mary”

“Yes, Mama.”

“Make me proud.”

“Where?”

“Everywhere.”

“Are you going somewhere, Mama?”

“No Dear, I’ll always be around.”

As she walks out, I called out

“Mama”

“Yes?”

“I love you”

“I love you too.”

I’ve played that conversation in my mind every day for the past 10 years.

Can’t seem to get it out of my mind.

can’t ignore the regrets.

“Mary!”
My attention is interrupted by Gabriel’s call.

“It’s time to go”

“Alright”

Seated in the car now beside Gabriel,

I take one last glance at the cemetery, and….

“I do miss her”

In memory of  Zainab (1993 – 2002)

Though I was too young then to understand or feel the pain of hurt you felt,

I do now, and i hope you’re somewhere better where you can’t feel pain anymore.

This post is also dedicated to anybody and everybody who has lost a loved one or family member to any form of cancer or terminal disease. God loves you.

Thanks for reading.

Please take time to drop your comments.

Damstylee

I