Lazy- A*s Writer

I’m a lazy-a*s writer

The laziest there is

I revel in my laziness

Aware of the writer’s code that refutes the use of the same words in succession

Like – lazy

But I don’t care

I’m too lazy to care

 

However, this only concerns writing

I’m an excellent sage

Some have even compared me to Ghandi

Thinking about it now, I sense it was all fallacy

And a bid to make me pick my pen again

And inspire people

And inspire I did

But for a short while

Until laziness struck. Again

And I dropped the pen for the umpteenth time

 

The world clamours for hard-working fellows

Work-crazy, rest-loathing, gruesome fellows

It also embraces abortion

Supports wars

And maims kids in their classrooms

Safe to say the world is psycho

So, I’ll ditch it’s expectations

And sulk on my couch further

Because I’m lazy

 

I’m lazy enough to watch TV all night

And see lifeless children litter the streets of Syria

Lazy enough to see hungry refugees lay half-dead on train tracks in Austria

Lazy enough to see that young girl across the street struggle to support the weight of the bulge in her tummy

Whilst the culprit; ‘Uncle’ saunters around town without remorse

And yet, at the corner of my eye, I watch the hard working folks scamper around town

Caught in the hustle and bustle of life

Oblivious of the pain

Ignorant of the chaos

 

They say life is a race

And everyone is running to win

Lazy me is confused

Win what?

But I’ve never quite figured it out

Perhaps because I’m too lazy to think it through

 

Seeing as I’ve digressed into territories I didn’t plan for

I think I’ll retreat a bit

And take back a few of my words

Perhaps I’ve exaggerated a bit

In my bid to kick start my almost dormant writing career

Yes, I’m a lazy writer

But no, I’m not a lazy person

But that’s what the world sees me as

The one that has so much time to be bothered about other’s worries

 

I’m a compassionate being

Sometimes to a fault

And although I’ll like to fly a plane and dump food all over Sudan

Or breeze into the minds of the soldiers in the middle east and whisper peace into their souls

I can’t do any of that

I can’t climb on a podium like Martin Luther King Jr and inspire

Or take hunger strikes like Ghandi

Hence, I can’t but feel helpless

And watch as the world goes knee deep in pain and suffering

So I’ll hold up my pen

And hide miles away from enemy lines

Furiously scribbling in my notepad words and more words

Words that I hope can make a greater impact than they would

For this reason, I consider myself lazy

A ‘lazy-a*s’ writer

 

Mike Dammy

 

 

 

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Life In Retrospect

It’s funny…
I’ve always wanted to start a personal blog and No, I’m not kidding. I really have. But every time I’ve tried, I’ve failed horribly. Emphasis on the word ‘Horribly.’

I mean, who would blame you readers, why would you want to be bored by my monotonous life stories?
I don’t live lavishly like a Kardashian or a Hilton. I can’t promise you pictures of different hotspots around the globe in one day or show you slideshows of the fantastic designer items I buy everyday but i know someone who can; Kim Kardashian and you know why. Kim probably has a private jet, and even if she doesn’t, she’ll possess visas to the most exciting countries and yea, Kanye’s money. How do I compete with that?
Simple. I can’t. At least not yet. Just wait till my bestseller debuts on New York Times Bestsellers list and we’ll see.

So for now, I’ll stick to my inspirational posts about some of my life episodes, your life episodes and insulting Shina Rambo… Kabish! (whatever that means -___-).

Moving on…
I had a run-in with a friend yesterday, exciting ordeal I tell you. I figured all he said concerned me as much as it concerns you and I decided to share what I learnt.

Simply put; this young man explained to me why the awards you’ve imagined yourself receiving for releasing that amazing single haven’t come yet, why some of you are still stuck up in those miserable jobs of yours, and why you’re still earning peanuts while your classmate from school saunters towards his next big promotion.
His reason was simple and straightforward; Fear.
Too simple right? That’s what I thought too.
Me?  Scared? Hell No!

I argued with him initially explaining how I wasn’t scared. How I was a bad guy. How I had six packs 😉 . How why I hadn’t finished or rather even started my book was because I was busy and not cos I was scared. But slowly and surely, he made me see reason and my job here right now is to make u see it too.

Here goes…

To be direct, I’m an Architect in the making, an amateur writer, a speaker, an annoying machine and a Ninja (True Story).
Architecture however is my first choice. My first love. Or so I thought.
I’ve designed buildings for about four years now and trust me, some have been really cool but I’ve never felt fulfillment from any of my designs as much as I felt yesterday when I posted Fire in our Bellies and saw the feedback from y’all. I mean, I was literally crazy with excitement. And then my friend showed up.

I’m awesome at initiating arguments and better at making them last for hours until my voice is hoarse. So when, my friend started, I smiled at my impending victory. This would be a walk in the park I thought. Minutes passed and it dawned on me that I was gonna lose. This my friend convinced me of what was actually wrong. I was truly scared. Scared of failure.

It’s known in Architecture that nobody’s opinion matters except that of your client and the national approval body. So the height of your shame is between a maximum of three to five persons. And even with that, you get to amend your corrections. That to me is not shame at all. So I understood that that was why Architecture was my first love. Cos failure was almost impossible. Unlike writing.

As a writer, you’re appealing to a group of people. Your readers, passers-by, critics, haters, those sharp mouthed, quick-to-crucify-folks on twitter and a host of other people. If you release an article of substandard quality, you can be murdered; literally, mentally, financially and physically.
Simply put; If you F**k up, you might lose your life!
I kid you not because I’ve been a victim. Once, I posted an article about Evolution on this blog and one white man from God knows where commented. Mehn, that guy took it P. Called me all sorts of names and finished me literally.  As a sharp guy, I formed moderator and deleted the comment but a part of my resolve died that day. It’s safe to say I encountered fear that day.
The fear of failure. The fear of rejection. And so, I shifted my attention to Architecture; my supposed love. But dare I say, I missed writing. Well, I’m back now. Let’s hope the white dude is not reading this but that’s by the way.

Stuff like this happens everyday in our society. In every office, every workplace, there is an unhappy fellow stuck to a desk because he’s scared of what people would say If they hear him sing or read his write ups like my case. With that thought in his mind, he has resolved to render what he’s excellent at a mere hobby. Something he indulges in when No one is watching. A secret the world mustn’t find out.

If that’s your case, banish that fear or you might regret it later in life.
I’m not writing this because I’m perfect, No.  Neither would I say I excel in all my endeavours but I understand one fact about life now. It won’t hold up a signboard telling you which direction to go or which career path to follow. It’ll leave you to put yourself on the your right path.

So, my advice…
Ditch that sorry good for nothing lazy ass attitude.
Sing If you want to. Dance If you feel like. Write If that’s what you’re good at. Don’t be bothered by how much your parents paid for your education (Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have good grades though ). You won’t be a Bill Gates Or Mark Zuckerberg by sitting at a desk when you know you don’t belong there.
There are many Beyonces out there… Countless Denzels, probably a few Bill Gates but We might never meet them If you’re scared of what happens next.

I’ll leave you to the rendered image of a church I designed in school recently. I look at it and I understand one thing; I do love Architecture but Writing is my true love.

image

My Design for a Remodelling of TREM Headquaters, Gbagada.

Have a lovely day.

Mike Dammy